Songs spells and blades
by Flaminea
Summary: Adrian Mahariel's souls is torn between the sweet, loving bard and the strong, passionate witch. Torn between guilt and love's needing. Rated M for some soft sex scenes.
1. Under the night's sky

The night sky was clear, shining with stars; only a light breeze flowed through the trees. Adrian admired that night's beauty while he watched out of the tent, trying not to wake up the red-haired woman beside him; she had to be deeply asleep, because she shifted on her right side without making a sound and showing him a peaceful smile on her lips and closed eyes. He hesitated a second, then leaned his lips on her cheek before sneaking away from the tent.

Of course, she had felt him leaving: even though her sleep was deep, each one of them had become used to unpleasant night attacks, and they all had trained themselves to wake from sleep on every single doubtful sound. That was why he had made up those stories about his..nightly walkings: without that, both the women would have awakened in alarm hearing and sensing him leaving.

He threw a glance at Zevran, who was sitting near the campfire, then melted into the shadows and crossed the whole camp, briefly looking back at Leliana's tent only once: as he came closer to the camp's more isolated tent, he noticed a light inside it. An amused smile took form on the dalish's lips, and he entered the tent without that the black-haired witch had seen him; he kept staying in the shadows until he touched her lips with his own. Looking into her eyes he first catched a glimpse of alarm.. which at once melted in hunger and passion; he deepened the kiss, and she put down her grimoire somewhere near before making him lay under her shivering body. The magical light died down.


	2. Torn Apart

One's honey sweet, the other has a bite.  
>One's heaven sent, the other rules the night.<br>And to the one I swear my love is true.  
>And to the other one I break the rules.<p>

(Torn apart, "Notre Dame de Paris")

"When I asked you, I had no doubt"

Adrian was still laying on his back when he heard the witch's words.

He turned to look at here, who was playing with a lock of black hair and was staring at him with a satisfied smile on her lovely lips. The dalish smiled in return and tickled her breasts' skin with his forefinger's tip.

"No doubt about what?"

"How possibly could you have chosen the bard instead of me? Not only she's totally insignificant, but she seemed to be reluctant even to kiss you? How much time did it take for one single kiss? Ridiculous..And all those talks about the Creator and love..I know you better.." She giggled and reached for his manhood, softly but nonetheless temptingly.

Fortunately for him, as he was on the edge of risking to betray himself: for a moment, he'd felt a pang of guilt, and remorse. After all that wasn't right..after all..Luckily every thought of guilt vanished as he felt her touch.

Almost an hour later, Adrian was breathing the night's open air again; it was almost time for his watch, Zevran was leaving the fire to get some rest.

He stood beside him, patting his hand on the elf's shoulder as a greeting.

"Tired?"

"Not much, my friend. What about you? You had some fun, didn't you?" asked Zevran with an amused look.

"Why, wouldn't you enjoy a woman like Morrigan?" answered Adrian in response.

"Oh, oh! You know me, I'd happily take a share if you both agreed, after all, even her cunning is deadly fascinating..But our fair bard too has some good shots..don't you think?"

"A fine woman, yes..why don't you try to win her affection if you like her?"

Adrian looked at Leliana's tent then to his friend "You may be lucky enough to explore her tent soon"

"Fine woman, I agree, but too much concerned about feelings for my taste. I look for pleasure, not for love. Besides, she seems to prefer our elven Warden's attentions.." The former crow said, a little too casually.

Adrian cleared his throat, a little nervously, a thought running around his head._ "Does he know? Is it of use lying to my only friend in this camp?"_

"We're just friends, close..friends, you know"

"Ah, and here you are revealing your secret! You see, I never asked you whether you visited her in her tent, yet you felt the need to excuse yourself. Well Warden, I guess congratulations are in order, I myself couldn't manage such a trick, sleeping in the same camp with both. How's that?"

The dalish elf sat on the ground and covered his face for a minute, without saying a word. He looked at Zevran again only when he sat beside him.

"I've never been a particularly principled person, but what I'm doing..well, the thought of deceive two women after I swore them both faithfulness..the thought never crossed my mind. I can afford this only because there's no much time for roaming freely and lose time for public mawkishness..It's bad, I know, yet I feel affection for them both and I can't seem to leave the hold of neither. Morrigan's so fierce, so passionate, I feel free with her, and yet I have to see Leliana in secret, the sweet Leliana who expressed love for me, the sweet bard who makes my heart beat when she holds me. But in the end I think about Morrigan's fire and strong personality and end up going back to her." Adrian blurted it all out as if the doubts had weighed on him for too much.

Zevran kept silence for a while searching for the right words, then spoke quietly.

"Warden, you're not like me, that's for sure. I chose pleasure over feeling a long time ago, and even though you may say that you cannot afford to feel so strong for someone you're not a man like me. Remember Rinna? I wounded her and was wounded myself. Now, our women aren't likely to die if you cheat on them, but it's not fair towards them and you'll end up hurting yourself too if you don't make a choice. I'm no prodigy of morality, but I always make things clear with the ones who share by bed with. Find your peace of mind, or you'll likely lose them both."

And without another word, the assassin left him alone with his thoughts.

The next day, the group left for Denerim. The Landsmeet was nearing and they had to attend it, of course; Adrian and Alistair were at the head of the group, and were discussing about his role as king.

"I won't say I like the idea of being king, but if..if that's necessary then I won't back away" said Alistair, reluctantly

"And what about the Queen? Maybe you should marry her and you could rule together..maybe she's pleasant"

Alistair looked puzzled, "Marry? I don't even know her, nor she knows me! Why don't you let her take the throne instead? Alone?"

The elf looked at Alistair before answering. "I know you, but not her. She may as well be a tyrant, while I know you're not. Find the strength."

They encamped three miles before the capital. Everyone set up his own tent, in silence: everyone was under great strain, after all the Landsmeet was the final test, they all knew it was the only occasion to defeat Loghain, to gain a chance to kill the Archdemon.

Since sleep didn't seem to catch anyone, so deciding the guard duties was pretty easy. Wynne and Morrigan only had to force themselves to sleep, to replenish their magical energy.

Adrian and Leliana took the second shift. He stood silent by the fire for what seemed an eternity; until he felt Leliana's hand on his own and her head on his shoulder. Only then, he softly smiled and caressed her red hairs.

"What's on your mind?"

He replied, whispering, calmly. "The Landsmeet. If we lose, Loghain will exile all of us and the Blight will be upon us, no hope to cherish. Leliana, he's the hero of River Dane, he's popular, he's mighty. And I'm an elf came from nowhere, what I've done during this year..I never saved anyone yet, anyone the nobility will care about..except for the Arl."

She listened, then silently turned around to look into his eyes. "Maybe your influence is not as strong as his, but his actions are questionable, and you..you're the type of person who can touch people's heart, you can strike the right note in everyone. The Arl is by your side, too, and he can support you. What's more..you managed to show me which was the right path for me, you lit the way for me, and believe it or not I'm sure the Creator is by your side." As Adrian looked into her eyes, bewitched by their love, she took both his hands into hers. "My love, I put my faith in you, now and forever, and I believe in you. You'll be successful, I know".

Her last sentence, from the bottom of her heart..made him heart thud in a way he could have never, ever thought possible. Unable to speak, he just kissed her lips softly and hugged her. _"May she be the one for me?"_


	3. Chapter 3

Never broke the silence, never broke the ice  
>No more waiting, I gotta wipe her off my mind<br>Loving her is dying, loving her is pain

Loving you was bleeding so I had to break away  
>Darkness' stretching out its hand to save me from your sway<br>'cause loving you was wasting, loving you was pain

I don't believe in your love

(Avantasia, "I don't believe in your love")

"Please follow me Wardens. I'll guide you and your companions to the guest rooms. Take your time to get fresh. Later, Arl Eamon will meet you in his study" the elven servant said.

"Thank the Arl for his hospitality, and tell him we'll join him as soon as possible" replied Adrian.

"Very well. Lunch will be served after your meeting with Arl Eamon". The servant bowed and the group followed him.

Adrian had already wore his leather armor and was brushing his shoulder-lenght brown hair when he heard a knock at his door. While covering himself with a towel, thinking it was one of the Arl's servant he said in a loud voice that he would have been ready in a moment.

"It's me..it's Morrigan"

The dalish opened the door to let her in. The uncomfortable look on her face surprised him; no reason to not invite her inside, so he did. Morrigan closed the door behind her and leaned herself agaisn it, without watching him.

He stared at her for a minute, waiting for her to speak. Only then he spoke."Everything alright? Your behavior is weird, to say the least"

She hesitated a moment before talking, but finally she looked at him and she did. "I..would like to hear your opinion about love, if you please"

Her words made his heart race and slow down in the same time, although he tried to remain calm. And his voice was calm, even amused, when he replied. "Strange question for a woman like you, Morrigan" he said, avoiding her question.

"Strange, you say? We've been together for some months, and once I even asked for..exclusivity, i asked you to stop passing so much time with the bard. I was jealous, you said it yourself..I wanted you to lay with me only, and at the time it was a..respect's issue, I thought I needed only to know that I alone was enough for you..yet.."

Adrian took a step towards her, but before he could reach for her she started talking again.

"..yet you're frequently on my mind now, much more frequently than I thought possible. I see you when I close my eyes to sleep, and I fear..it could be love. Please, tell me you don't love me"

She was looking at him now, on her face an imploring look.

He kept silence for some moments, without going near her. At last he took her hands into his and murmured softly. "What if I did?"

Her behavior changed instantly: she curtly let go of his hands, then pushed him away. Her voice was harsh when she talked. "Then we would be two fools! Love's a distraction, a danger, people like you and I aren't allowed to love each other!"

He understood. She loved him, but at the same time he was losing her. Deep inside himself, he knew he couldn't afford that. "Love's not a distraction, or a danger! I want you here, with me, you and no one else. Please, release your feelings, allow yourself to make the choice for once! I told you, remember? You don't have to be as harsh as you learned to be in the Wilds!" He didn't move, he was too afraid to see her leaving.

"..I don't deserve someone like you, I would only hurt you and you deserve the chance to build a better life." she answered, her voice creaking.

"You do, you deserve me just like I need your love!" And telling her so he tried to hold her arms. She abruptly stepped back, her eyes full of anger and sorrow. He could catch a glimpse of his light-blue eyes into hers, and what he saw was a desperate man.

"Please, tell me you want to end this. Just tell me that and I promise you, you'll find out you made the right choice" Morrigan said, coldly and sadly at the same time.

Adrian let his harm drop, his eyes staring at the floor. He was overwhelmed by anger and delusion, on one hand he wanted to hold her and never let her go, on the other he wanted to slap her for being so selfish..and a liar. He clenched his fists, trying to dominate his anger without succeeding.

"Fine then! So be it, It's over. You were right, you don't deserve me, otherwise you wouldn't be so damn selfish and you wouldn't deny yourself, and me, a rightful happiness! You're the ice princess, the strong one, and yet you're weak against yourself, you can't even reach to grab me, the one you want, condemning both you and me. I only wasted my time with you, I realized that's love what I need and I seek, and you can't give it to me!"

Adrian slipped her ring off his finger and threw it against a wall, angrily.

"Worst of all, you don't even love me, or you wouldn't turn me down! You're just a liar!" he cried.

She stood still, emotionless, listening to him. And when he finally shut up, she opened the door and said only two cold words before leaving: "Goodbye, Warden"

Adrian didn't stop her.


End file.
